First Book: Lord Change Me

I must admit when I picked up this book to read it for the third time in my life, I was a little apprehensive.  God had transformed my life both times I read it.  The process of change was not easy, but the end result was a changed woman. 

The second time I read this book I was living in the Philippines as a missionary.  I had been praying that if God wanted to change me, he would give me the desire to be willing to work at change in my life again.  He answered that prayer, and once again, the Lord Changed me.

Yes, the two times I have read this book, God changed me.  I am so thankful for the changes he has made in my life.  I will trust him as I read this book once more in remembrance of Evelyn Christenson, the author, who is in heaven with Jesus today.

LORD CHANGE ME by Evelyn Christenson

It was a cozy winter day in the small town of Stoughton, WI.  The snow was falling gently to the ground as I gazed out my living room window.  The white snow looked sparkly and soft.   Snuggled up in a warm blanket I began to pray.

Dear God,

How will you speak to me as I begin reading this book?   I want to be listening, so please open my heart to hear your voice and obey.   If there are changes that I need to make in my life, please come quickly and show me. Thank you for what you are going to do.

In Jesus Name, Amen.

As I sat there in the quietness of the morning, I opened the pages of this book and began, yet another, Journey of change.

It warmed my heart to read the words that were familiar to me.  Within an hour, I closed the book after the very first chapter because God has spoken to my heart very clearly.  In fact, he had been preparing me for the changes that he wanted me to make in my life.

 Quote from the book Lord Change me. Evelyn:  page 17

“That same June, I had more changes to make.  (What a horrible month that was!”)   
      I discovered something new about myself—because my daughter told me.

 At the dinner table one evening Jan, our just turned –eighteen eldest, abruptly announced, “Mother, I don’t ever want to hear your philosophy again.  Do you know that the tone of your voice actually changes when you are giving your philosophy?  I know what’s coming every single time.”

 

My heart ached as I read this because in last six months or so I had been thinking the same thing about my husband and children.  Did they get tired of me talking about my philosophy on serving God?  If they did not feel the same way as I did, I was sure it must have been annoying.  My heart attitude was not wrong for wanting them to love God with all of their heart and to take time for him, but this is their choice.

God has even confirmed this to me last night.  My oldest son had come to visit for my birthday.  We enjoyed some wonderful talk time as we often do.  I wanted to ask my son a very important question, it was, “When you were young did I talk about God to much, and he replied, “Not when we were young, but as we got older, maybe.”  Ouch!  God had confirmed that my children probably felt the same way as Evelyn’s daughter had.   

You know as a parent we always want to save our children from going through the tough lessons of life.  If we can share from our experiences and help them to skip a step in learning, we want to do this, but is it what they really want?  I guess not.

Well, I have my work cut out for me this year.  I need to “Be still … wait patiently for God to work.”  It was not my job to change anybody, but God is the one to make the changes. 

It is incredible that the very first chapter in this book is going to be one area where I need to change.  It will be so hard to be still and quiet and not share anything about the deepest passion in my heart, God, and our relationship with him.  If they ask my opinion, it is ok to share it, but SILENCE must be my only word and prayer is my only recourse.  

Dear God,

Thank you for what you have already shown me today.  I am sorry if I have been sharing my opinions too much.  Please silence my heart.  This is going to be real hard for me, but I will trust you to help me.  Thank you for what you will teach me.